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August Collective Collaborative Blog: Songs We Like From Artists We Don't Like

8/9/2020

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Call it an exception, hidden gem or a guilty pleasure, there’s always bound to be a good song from an artist you can’t stand. For the August collab blog, members of the collective discuss the songs they like from the artists they don't like!


​Alex's Picks

Song: “Drops of Jupiter”
Artist: Train
Album: Drops of Jupiter (2001)
I have two beliefs about the band Train. First, you know that discussion everyone has about the worst bands ever? You know, the one that firmly cemented the names of Nickelback, Limp Bizkit, and Creed as synonymous with bad music? I believe that Train are not in that discussion nearly as much as they need to be. They are truly terrible, and they’ve only gotten worse as the years have gone by. Train is the musical equivalent of “Live Laugh Love” home decor - tacky, tasteless, cringey, and if you come across someone who likes it, that’s a sign you should turn around and run for the hills. The second belief I have about Train is that “Drops of Jupiter” is one of the greatest songs ever written. I don’t understand how they managed to conjure this beautiful, soulful work of art, then proceeded to suck for nearly two decades straight afterwards. “Drops of Jupiter” is a touching tribute to singer Pat Monahan’s late mother that hits something deep when you hear it. It’s also a total sleeper hit at karaoke - nobody expects it, but when you bust it out, you’ll be hard pressed to find anyone in the room who isn’t singing along.
​

Song: “State of Love and Trust”
Artist: Pearl Jam
Album: Singles: Original Motion Picture Soundtrack (1992)
I don’t really understand why this is a controversial opinion, but I’ve been met with enough surprised, confused reactions when I say it, so here it goes: I hate Pearl Jam. I realize I’m not alone when I say this, though. I know a lot of people get turned off by Eddie Vedder, both by his vocals and his Bono-esque political preachiness. Personally I don’t have a problem with his politics. In fact, I’m glad he uses his platform as a famous crappy musician to raise awareness of issues that are bigger and more important than his band’s success. People with bad taste in music tend to have bad politics - if you tell me you’ve seen Nickelback or Trapt in concert, I’m going to assume you also take off your mask once you’re inside the grocery store, and that you just think *you* should be able to use that word, too, because you heard a black guy say it once. Eddie Vedder is a force for good among people with bad taste in music. He’s not the hero we deserve, but he’s the hero we need. 

He still is a horrible singer, though, and that’s not even the whole picture. The entire band is simply so boring. Let’s start with Vedder: you remember the sound of the grown-ups talking on the Peanuts cartoons? That muted trombone going, “mwah-MWAH-mwa-mwa-mwa-MWAH-mwah-mwah,” that Charles Schultz used because grown-up talk isn’t interesting enough? That’s Eddie Vedder. You can’t understand what he’s singing, and at the end of the day, do you really care enough to make an effort to find out? The rest of the band doesn’t do anything to help their music, either - their riffs and ideas never go anywhere. Their best-known songs repeat the same two-chord riff, over and over, until the next song comes on, where they play a different two-chord riff that’s a little slower or something. Say what you will about their heirs apparent in Creed, but at least they had a talented guitarist in Mark Tremonti who played flashy enough to kinda distract you from Scott Stapp. Pearl Jam has nothing. There’s a reason why the only time you hear Pearl Jam is over the loudspeakers at the mechanic when you’re waiting for them to finish up your oil change. Or waiting at the DMV. Pearl Jam is waiting room music, because you keep waiting for something, anything, to happen when you listen to them. And just like your number being called at the DMV, that something never comes.

So what do I like about “State of Love and Trust?” Well.. it’s relatively fast, so at least it goes by quickly. And as far as songwriting goes, they at least get to the point. And to be fair, it’s not a terrible song - I find myself humming the chorus to myself from time to time. And those guitar solos admittedly rip. Still, I’m 99.9% more likely to listen to The Gaslight Anthem’s cover than the original on the days that I actually feel like listening to it. Fuck Pearl Jam.
​
Song: “Remember Everything”
Artist: Five Finger Death Punch
Album: American Capitalist (2011)
I remember the first time I heard Five Finger Death Punch. I was in high school, and their song “Ashes,” off their debut album The Way of The Fist, got a fair amount of play on my local student radio station. I remember thinking to myself, “Did Hatebreed sell out and start making radio friendly bullshit?” I thought nothing of them at the time, assuming they’d be a flash-in-the-pan act that I wouldn’t hear from again after 2010. 

Fast forward to today, and Five Finger Death Punch is one of the biggest metal bands in the world. I guess the Kyle meme exists for a reason. They’re still pumping out generic bro-metal for dudes who seriously need therapy, balanced out with generic bro-metal ballads for when you need to cry totally-not-pussy tears that are 95% decaffeinated energy drink on those nights where there’s no more drywall to punch and you JUST MISS HER SO MUCH, BRO. 

But seriously - one of these ballads, “Remember Everything,” is gut-wrenchingly powerful. Singer Ivan Moody shines in his delivery portraying the vicious cycle of domestic abuse. His tender verses evoke the pain of trauma suffered at home during childhood, but in the blink of an eye, the narrator morphs into the role of the abuser as an adult by the time the bridge hits. I hear “Remember Everything” and can’t help but compare it to “November Rain,” “I Don’t Want To Miss A Thing,” “Home Sweet Home,” and all the other songs in the pantheon of great power ballads. So go ahead - throw on your best Fox Racing t-shirt, pound a Mountain Dew, spark your lighter in the air, and let it all out… bro.
​

Song: “Dance Floor Anthem (I Don’t Want To Be In Love)”
Artist: Good Charlotte
Album: Good Morning Revival (2007)
I”ll come out and say it - we were all too hard on Good Charlotte back in the day. Even if they weren’t your favorite pop-punk band, they weren’t terrible by any stretch of the imagination. No matter how “hXc” we wanted to look on MySpace, it’s past time for all of us to grow up and accept that we hated on this band for no real reason. “Dance Floor Anthem” is especially catchy, and even has a spot on my 2000s pop-punk and emo Spotify Playlist. I think the reason I like it so much is because I never thought of Good Charlotte as a punk band, and on this song, they don't even try to be “punk.” They just make something you can dance to. It’s a good way to ease into their music if you still don't… *ahem*... throw all your hands up for “The Anthem.” I hope the Madden brothers accept my sincerest apology for all my Young and Hopeless years of teen angst. It was as if I was living the Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous: I was always complaining. I subscribed to a mob mentality, akin to those who believe that girls don't like boys, girls like cars and money. From here on out, I just wanna live.
​

Parisa's Picks

Song: “Do Ya Think I’m Sexy”
Artist: Rod Stewart
Album: Blondes Have More Fun (1978)
One of the most mindblowing music history facts is that Rod Stewart had the second most highly attended concert of all time. That’s the kind of thought that keeps me up at night. How has society gone this astray to make Rod Stewart as popular as he is? Don’t get me wrong, I like some Faces songs, but Rod Stewart’s solo career totally blows. The super cheesy '80s production, his scratchy voice, the skin tight glam rock leather pants…ugh.  Even just thinking about his bleached mullet makes me shudder. Apparently millions upon millions of people would disagree with me, seeing as how he's one of the top-selling artists of all time and an international sex icon,  but I will say, “Do Ya Think I’m Sexy” is my biggest guilty pleasure. The disco-rock ‘n roll fusion is just the right amount of cheese and catchiness, and the lyrics exude so much confidence it’s borderline obnoxious. But you know, sometimes it’s fun to bask in that fantasy and strut around to this song like you’re hot shit. 

With all that praise being said, the reasons I love this song should all be credited to the artists that Stewart plagiarized (and was eventually sued over). The chorus of “Do Ya Think I’m Sexy”, which is really the only good part about the song, was taken from the melody of Jorge Ben’s 1972 track “Taj Mahal”, and the strings sample Bobby Womack’s “Put Something Down On It” from 1975.  

AND on top of all that, I can firmly say that the remix from UK eurodance/club DJs N-Trance is 10000% better than the original. One of the best nostalgic club hits of the 90s, and I’m far more grateful for the Night of the Roxbury soundtrack introducing me to this remix than I am of Rod Stewart’s existence. 

Song: “thank u, next”
Artist: Arianna Grande
Album: thank u, next (2019)
OKAY HOLD UP, before you all freak out on me, let me make it clear that I have nothing against Arianna Grande. I realize she’s talented and has a great voice, but that being said, I’m just not a fan of her music. Maybe this is a cliché music snob thing to say, but I’m not a fan of most Top 40 pop music in general. Arianna’s single “thank u, next”, however, is an exception to that rule. I can’t remember the last time I heard a song that had such positive and healthy attitudes towards relationships. It’s cathartic to listen to break-up songs with angsty or resentful lyrics, but “thank u, next” offers a more mature means of looking at your previous relationships. It’s about understanding how those relationships have helped you grow as a person, and you can move on with gratitude for your growth and self-improvement, rather than dwelling on the past with spite. That kind of nuance is something you hardly hear in mainstream pop music, and this song makes me really admire how Arianna is using her fame for such positive influence. (On top of all that, this song is an absolute bop.)
​

Hazel's Picks

Song: "This Kiss"
Artist: Faith Hill
Album: Faith (1995)
First things first - I really only listen to this song when I am reminded of it by Carly Rae Jepsen's better, but unrelated, song of the same name. I don't spend any time thinking about Faith Hill, I don't have enough of an opinion to dislike her music. I just don't care about it. But damn does "This Kiss" go hard. Twangly little country guitars, clean production, catchy lyrics. It's just a real good pop song and that's that

Song: "Running Up That Hill"
Artist: Kate Bush
Album: Hounds of Love (1985)
Here's where the pitchforks come out: I don't enjoy Kate Bush's music. It's never really done it for me and I can't really nail down why. Maybe one day it'll click, but I've tried and failed to get into it. "Running Up That Hill", however, is a jam. Never a song I would put on for myself, but a song I would be pretty pleased to hear at a supermarket or something. I feel the same way about "Once In A Lifetime" by the Talking Heads. "Running Up That Hill" is the kind of song I'll hear someone else listening to and think "Yeah! Alright!" The drama and cheesiness of the '80s and Bush's music in general hits a sweet spot for me here, and I'll make a deal with God! 

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